Honesty

A bear can only be poked so many times before it wakes up and looks you in the eye. You can only taunt him for so long until he takes a swipe at you. And in this case, my friends, this mama bear has been poked and taunted too many times. And so, as any good mama bear does to protect her young, the claws are out and swinging.

In case you follow my blog regularly, you'll have noticed by now that I have been silent for a very long time. To be honest, there are many posts that are in the editing stage, but when I started to review the content, I realized that every single post has negative things to say . Such is my way of thinking at the moment. Frustration, stress, sleeplessness, anger, and irritability all boil down to one single thing: a lack of control. In the fight for marriage equality and a greener earth, there is one fight that we seem to have forgotten. A fight that, for me, has become of the utmost importance since becoming a mother. We seem to have forgotten the fight for the innocence and safety of our children.

I can't control the people who choose to text while driving, endangering their own lives and the lives of others on the road, including those of my kids. I can't control the fact that sexual expression has overrun our society, to the point where kids as young as 7  these days find it halarious to post humiliating videos of their enemies, purposely getting them naked and in compromising positions, and then sending it to a web site for all to see, or hearing a 6 year old talking about his daddy's porn collection while his 4 year old brother is gyrating on the patio to "I'm sexy and I know it". I can't control that song S&M by Rihanna seems to play on repeat at certain grocery stores, despite it's X rated lyrics and the fact that the singer herself was surprised it got airplay.  I can't control the fact that during class a teacher will show an online video of a lunatic killing, having sex with, mutilating and then eating his victim. I can't control the fact that all around us children are being exposed to things so sinister, so dark, so disgusting, and parents just shrug their shoulders and say, "Oh well, it was bound to happen. Oh well, you know, boys will be boys. Oh well, kids can be cruel. Oh well, they need to learn to toughen up. Oh well, you just need to do a better job as a parent."

I ask you, WHAT IN THE HECK ARE WE DOING TO OUR CHILDREN?????  In the fight for freedom of expression, freedom to do whatever we like, to be entertained, to post whatever tickles our fancy, freedom to explore our deepest darkest desires, our children are the ones being burned. Our children are the ones that will have seen 100,000 murders on television before they turn 18. Our children are the ones that will have porn images burned into their brains for the rest of their lives, affecting their future relationships and jobs (see the Mcleans article on men and porn if you don't believe me) Our children are the ones that are learning to bully others from what they are shown from the adults. We can't even watch a hockey game without teaching our children that fist fights are exciting, or that the only way to have fun is to get drunk while dancing around practically naked, and that you can only wear that bikini if you look hot, and that looking hot is where you get your sense of identity from. That you are only valued if you are good in bed. That if you choose to with only one person in your life, you shall be mocked, jeered, and humiliated for wanting to keep beautiful something so intimate. Forget that the legal age for consent is 16; from the time our kids are babies they are being exposed to sexual images, lyrics, and the idea that life IS sex (and dirty naughty sex at that), not that sex is just a beautiful PART of life.

In a world where an episode of the Kardashians sums up everything our culture seems to strive for, we have cheapened our children's lives. We are cheapening our own lives. I can't even take my kids to the grocery store without them seeing magazines with dead or naked people on the cover, articles screaming in bold letters "His Wildest Sex fantasies come to life!", the drugs, the scandals. I can't go to a family restaurant without the "Dr Love" store that moved in beside it have their display window full of sex toys and giant wall sized images of naughty nurses right next to the restaurant door.  I can't let my kids run and play outside by themselves because of the knowledge that the little 6 year old, when innocently playing doctor, is going to act out what he's seen on the computer on another unsuspecting little child.

Frankly, I am sick of it. I've been pushed to the brink of fed-upness. I hate the feeling that everywhere I turn, my impressionable little ones are being fed false messages of worth and value and being exposed to adult activities much too early. Sure, I could move to a cave. I could keep my kids inside all day, never venturing out in the light of day. But I don't want to. I want to be a contributing part of society. I want that for my kids. I want to be able to take them to the store and teach them how to count, what foods to buy, and what to look for on the labels. I want to be able to have an evening out with my family at a restaurant. I want my kids to be able to play with the neighbours. But I want this without their senses being ASSAULTED by damaging images of adult activities and false messages of worth.

And so, today, I'm out to warn you that I am on a war path. Call me a prude. Call me a cow. Call me unenlightened. Call me overprotective. Call me unsatisfied.  I don't care. My JOB is to protect the innocence of my impressionable kids. To help them to grow up to be kind, loving, honest individuals who get their self worth from being a child of God and not how some random person rates their looks on a sexiness scale of 1 to 10. To teach my kids that every single person is of equal value in the eyes of God, and that our hands are to heal, not destroy. Our mouths are to speak truth and love, not jealousy and spiteful words. That even when we are hurt, our actions must remain kind.  That life is not fair, but in the unfairness there is beauty. That true beauty comes from a pure heart. 

To the grocery stores, I am boycotting you until you put covers on those magazines and start playing G-rated music. Farmers markets, here I come! To the MPs, I am asking you to create laws prohibiting gore and sexual humiliation sites. I'm also asking that it be made a crime to watch child porn from live streaming, not from just possessing it. To all the adults, I'm asking you to think. Think long and hard about what your freedom of expression is doing to our children. Is it worth all the hurt and pain in their lives?  The depravity that our kids are beginning to manifest? To the parents, I'm asking you to start fighting for your children. Start fighting for their right to innocence. Start fighting for their protection. Start teaching them right from wrong. Start teaching them that each person counts.

 It only takes a small stone to start an avalanche, and that is what I'm hoping to do.

There. I'm not done my rant by any means. Like I said, mama bear has awoken and the paws are swinging. Please help me in my fight to keep our kids innocence for as long as we can. For their RIGHT to innocence.  If you do feel the same way, (and I KNOW that I am not the only one), start writing letters to your MP and your local stores.  Together, we CAN change the course of society, at least for our children's sake.

Thank you.

All About Elowenn

Elowenn is my darling little 7 month old. I can't believe how fast time has gone with her, and I enjoy every single minute with our surprise baby. And because Charlotte is usually the "star" of my posts, I figured it's high time that you knew a little about our other baby girl!

Little Elowenn is a tiny, chubby, snuggly little cherub of a baby. She is happy 95% of the time, and is constantly screaming in delight and making adorable baby noises. She only wakes up 2 times in the night to nurse, and has 2 naps a day. And all I need to do is put a soother in her mouth, lay her down, and boom! Her little eyes close and she falls asleep with barely a peep. This, for us, is REVOLUTIONARY!!!

She is very attached to her Mama, and is constantly smothering me with kisses and hugs. She is a champion nurser (seriously, it only takes her 10 minutes to empty both sides) and loves sweet potatoes and hates avacado and bananas.

She has been described as "a little blob" by her pediatrician, for the simple reason that Elowenn doesn't move. She doesn't roll, or really make much of an effort. The reason for this? The doctor thinks it's simply because she doesn't have to, and not that she can't. With a doting big sister and her mama wrapped around her little finger, everything is brought to her on a platter.  She loves the jolly jumper and can sit up for hours, though if she falls over she can't get back up yet. And she loves to observe. She loves to observe so much that she can sit through an hour and a half church services without fussing. She loves to watch her big sister and all her antics, and will giggle and wiggle and scream whenever Charlotte comes near her.

And that's all about Elowenn. She is so easy to love, so easy to mother, and just so darn cute with her big baby blue eyes and dimpled hands.  She has changed our world!

Addiction

I never used to drink coffee. Even though it's the drug of choice for many, the aroma and bitter taste just never appealed to me. Some would tell me, "It's an acquired taste, you'll get used to it," but the best I could do was a specialty coffee or put lots of Bailey's into that cup a joe and then smother it in whipped cream. I just never felt I liked it. Or needed it. That is, until I had 2 kids.

I don't know what possessed me, but one day I was tired. Exhausted, actually. With the days so short, there are only a few hours to get things done. Then subtract the hours where your 2 year old needs attention. Then subtract the time your baby needs for nursing, burping, and changing. That leaves a whopping 30 minutes (at least it feels like that) to clean the dustballs rolling across the floors, get 50 loads of laundry folded and put away without the toddler unfolding it all and throwing it around the room, and make 3 square meals.

Where was I going with this? Oh yes, I was exhausted to the point of sleeping while standing at the counter. And there, I saw some coffee. Luke warm coffee that the hubby had not finished before leaving for work. And for some reason in my cloudy brain, I forgot that I don't like coffee. All I saw was a drink ready for consumption, and that I wouldn't have to life a finger to make something for myself. And I mechanically grabbed that mug and downed its contents with one gulp. And then I had an epiphany.

I actually LIKE coffee! After 31 years of going for tea, I had discovered why people drink the dark stuff. And now, I have become a believer. I learned how to use our coffee maker (seriously I had no idea how to use it before). And I can't start my morning without my cup-a-joe. And if you want to go for coffee, I'm game. I'll even order an americano, with an extra espresso shot. And thank you Lord for a natural way to give me energy after being woken up 6 times every night for the last 5 months!

The Remember Whens

If I were to describe my life right now, I don't think it would make for the most interesting post. I'm the mother of 2 young kids, one of which is a mischievious and busy toddler. I'm the wife of an amazing and busy man. I'm desperately trying to lose the baby weight but am completely and utterly unsuccessful in my attempts.

But as boring as that all sounds, there are so many things that happen during the day that are becoming the "Remember When" moments, those moments where today they make me frustrated or horrified, but in 20 years I will look back on them and laugh.

Like when I caught my monkey of a 2 year old sitting in the suitcase that was being packed for our trip to Paris, surrounded with shreds what was the pretty wrapping paper of the gifts we were to bring along. And when she licked (yes, licked) her babysitter's behind and found it the funniest thing in the world. And when she got out of her bed, went into her sister's room, and decided to create a giant mural on the freshly painted wall with a ball point pen. And when she was hungry and dragged a chair over to the stove, turned it on, filled a pot with pasta and put that on the hot element, miraculously without burning herself. At 5:30am. Or after a punishment I asked her how we got there, and she said, "well, mama, once upon a time I was a princess, and I hitted my stister and taked her toys and waked her up. But Jesus still loves me though, mommy".

And then there are the moments that I cherish even as they happen, and that I know I'll hold dear as time marches on. Like when Elowenn giggles as I kiss her chubby feet. And when Charlotte throws her arms around me and says, "Mama, you're my best friend. I love you so much in the whole wide world!" And watching my little 4 month old sleep, a chubby dimpled hand resting on her squishable rosy cheek. And dancing around in crazy circles with my little Lottie, all to fall into a heap on the floor and a tickle war ensues. Or seeing the excitement when Daddy walks in after a long hard day at work as one little girl does the happy dance and the other grins ear to ear.

It's an exciting and crazy time of life. It keeps me on my toes, and I am by no means a ballerina. But I love it.