The Art of Discipline

Our 16 month old has really started to test us. Besides still not sleeping through the night, she has started the terrible ones. "Charlotte, we do not hit mommy." "Charlotte, we do not hit daddy". "Charlotte, we do not throw food on the floor." "We do not throw food on the floor". "We do not throw food on the floor". "We do not throw food on the floor". "We do not throw food on the floor". "We do not throw food on the floor". "We do not throw food on the floor". "We do not throw food on the floor". "We do not throw food on the floor".

And so repeats my day. Every meal time, she gets about 3 time outs for throwing food. It's a problem because she really does do it on purpose. She looks us straight in the eye, daring us to give her a time out. We've gotten used to her full body tantrums, and I've learned to just make sure her head is safe before simply walking away.

But we've tried pretty much everything we can think of to get her to stop throwing her food. We've ignored it, we've given a tap on the hand, we've given her time outs, we've taken her food away, we've made her clean it up. The problem is that it just doesn't work. She will come straight out of her time out and rebelliously throw something again, just to show us how angry she is. This has been getting consistantly worse over the last 6 months, to the point where we don't dare bring her anywhere else so there won't be spaghetti on our hosts' windows.

I'm kind of at my wits end. Who knew that a one year old could be so strong willed? My mother said that I was the same way, so I should know how to handle her. The trouble is, I really don't have a CLUE how to handle this stage. We try to be consistant and always explain why she's in time out. I try to control my temper, but it's true that by the end of the day I am 150% fed up of wiping food off the walls, the rugs, and myself, and tend to get a little angrier than when she does it at breakfast.

So that's where I'm at. I have a beautiful, bright little girl, but if you have any suggestions I'm all ears. I've worn out all my wash cloths.

Confessions of an ER Patient

Yesterday I spent a few hours in the ER. I had picked Charlotte up for the millionth time that morning,and something just gave. I felt a stab of pain so acute that I almost dropped my baby, and kind of ended up tossing her on the couch before falling to the floor. Never in my whole life have I felt pain that badly. It seemed to radiate throughout my body, and even moving my head just a milimeter seemed to make it 50 times worse than it already felt.

Not one to play the hero, I went to the ER. I was surprised at how long the paperwork took. When I was done at the reception desk, I was sent to triage. When I was done at the triage desk, I was sent back to the reception desk. That in itself took 20 minutes. I do need to mention that I was in the worst pain I have ever been in. Ever. When a screaming child with an ear infection came in, I was tempted to cry right along with him. Being the good adult patient, I waited like a good girl until I got called. I walked ever so slowly, gritting my teeth the whole way as not to scream while I was shown to the observation room.

I patiently waited while the guy next to me b**ched and complained that he was in terrible pain and needed a doctor NOW, and that he'd been this way since Tuesday. I couldn't help but think,"Geez, buddy, you've had all week to come and you left it until now?" I was even more bitter when I heard the doctor tell him that there was nothing wrong with him and that his blood work was pristine, and proceeded to send him home.

I felt a little sorry for the doctor. He seemed very flustered. I heard one of the nurses say that he was alone all morning for the whole ER. I also listened to one nurse complain about her salary, vacation time, shift lines, and how she spent 5000 dollars on a couch. About how the ER was not busy at all and she was bored. All the while, I was fighting back wave after wave of pain, trying not to faint or scream.

I saw a kid who had broken his collar bone. Yes, he had a good reason for bumping me. So did the kid who needed a bunch of stitches. But the soccer player who had a sore shoulder and only needed an ice pack? Really? I started to question if I was being too quiet. That maybe if I did scream someone would actually take notice of the girl stuffed in the corner, with silent tears streaming down her face. But I didn't. I just continued to wait.

After about 2 hours, a nurse showed up. It was the same one who was complaining about how slow it was and how bored she was. She just took the same info that the triage nurse had taken. Then she wisked away, promising the doctor would be there soon.

After another hour, the doctor finally came. X rays would reveal a pinched nerve and herniated disk in my upper back, which is not only painful but explained the tingling right down to my feet. Physio and chiropractor should help, he said. He called for the nurse, and I heard him ask her to give me a 'good dose' of morphine and toradol. The nurse came back in and gave me the hip shots. Then I was free to go.

I glanced around as I left the ER, (yep, I could actually turn my head by that time)and saw all of the empty beds, and a few people waiting to be seen. I have to say that I am really grateful to live in a place where we have access to care. When I think of places that I've visited where there's no doctor within 400 miles I thank God to live where I do. At the same time though, living where we do, should there not be more doctors available, ER? Do we really have to listen to the nurse complain that she's bored out of her tree, while you are waiting over 3 hours to be seen, which feels like a lifetime when you're in pain? I'm not so sure.

So today I'll just say that I am happy that we have the care, and that my pain was relieved once the morphine took over. And we'll leave it at that.